Tuesday, October 16, 2007

virtue - decline, extinction - my musing

" virtue is on the decline and heading towards extinction."
This is a statement from a young and upwardly mobile gentleman that i know.
And this really got me thinking...
What is virtue? Is it a relative term? And is it really on the decline?

This statement automatically spurned me into self examination and i immediately began to feel uneasy and the resultant sub-conscious attitude was self-defense. Though i still went down the path of self analysis, compared the good-old -days with high moral standards and the Sweet-mordern-day with decaying moral standards and i thought to myself that virtue would definitely have a different meaning from those 'good-old-days' considering what is obtainable now. And so, if virtue is NOT what i think it is...then maybe i ain't doing too bad.

Since i was uncertain about the meaning of that word "Virtue", i decided to do my research. The first thing that came to mind is the bible verse that talks about the virtuous woman - then i began to wonder, is virtue a feminine quality? Is it more vital for a woman than for a man?

Virtue is from a latin word called Virtus and based on it's origin, it signifies manliness or courage. Virtue as it is now known depicts moral excellence of a person. It is a trait valued as being good. The opposite of which is 'vice'.
BroadESTly speaking, virtue means the excellence of perfection of a thing, (just imagine those 2 words side by side - excellence and perfection, they make virtue sound almost unattainable). And in its strictest meaning, however, as we all understand it, virtue is good habit, essentially moral excellence, chastity.

Going further, the meaning and essence of virtue will be weakly denoted if reference is not made to the bible verse -Proverbs 31:10. That scripture is pregnant with meaning, that's a whole text book in less than 10 lines.

Virtue is more than high moral standards. It is resourcefulness, proactiveness, creativity, aesthetics, doggedness, strenght, courage...just name it. Virtue is all.
And if the good book particularly associates it with women, then maybe it is more valuable to us.

The standard for right and wrong is not a cultural thing, therefore it is not location specific. What is right is predominantly right and so is what is wrong, this probably informed the saying "call a spade a spade". Infidelity, wastefulness are as bad in Africa as they are in Asia or any other part of the world. And if it's so, i can then conclude that Virtue is not a relative term.

About it being on the decline? I need to ask the menfolk.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007


I have been out for too long, but i must say that it's good to be back. I had been out for almost half year, not like there was nothing to write about but i needed to find passion again.
It's a nice thing that blogging is gaining recognition in Nigeria to the extent that a well known mag had a whole section on a number of female bloggers in Nigeria. I almost feel like i've missed out o a whole lot.

My 'break' was eventful; a whole lot to blog about whenever i run out of ideas. The whole period was like a begining and a getting used to a new phase in my life - new work environment, job description, challenges and all. Anyway, i met a 'wonderful' set of people from Zimbabwe as part of the then new work environment; and now, Zimbabwe has joined my list of
must-visit countries. And one Particularly fascinating thing is the great Victoria falls or Mosi-oa-Tunya (The smoke that thunders).
Victoria falls are by some measures, the largest waterfall in the world, and can also be said to be among the most unusual in form, and having arguably the most diverse and easily-seen wildlife of any major waterfall site. Some people say that this Victoria falls have an hallucinating effect on tourists. One tend to see other things (imaginary) that ordinarily don't exist there. This may be due to its unusual form which enables virtually the whole width of the falls to be viewed face-on, at the same level as the top, from a close range.
Many of Africa's animals and birds can be seen in the immediate vicinity of Victoria Falls, and the continent's range of river fish is also well represented, enabling wildlife viewing and sport fishing to be combined with sightseeing. The falls are shared between Zambia and Zimbabwe, and each country has a national park to protect them and a town serving as a tourism centre: Mosi-oa-Tunya National Park and Livingstone in Zambia, and Victoria Falls National Park and the town of Victoria Falls in Zimbabwe.

Antelopes can be seen in these areas and troops of nonchalant baboons patrol the walkways. Airborne droplets of fine mist creates an almost a constant rainbow, which can even be seen by the light of the moon.The Victoria Falls are shared by both Zambia and Zimbabwe and is territorially divided by Cecil Rhodes' famous bridge - which he never lived to see.
As well as a spectacular view down into the gorge, this bridge has more recently become famous for its adrenaline-pumping bungy jump with a fall of 364 feet (111 meters)! The other most popular adventure pursuit here is white-water rafting on the Zambezi.
The park contains some big game such as elephants, buffalo, lions, giraffe and antelopes like kudu and waterbuck, along with plenty of hippos and crocs.
Riverine bird life is plentiful with egrets, herons, cormorants, fish eagles and kingfishers.The Zambezi is renowned for its tigerfish, tilapia and giant vundu (catfish) over 6 ft long.

It is the widest curtain of falling water in the world, and during the warm wet months of February to April, it cascades at over thirty times its dry season flow. The resulting spray can be seen from 20 miles (32kms) away and explains the local African name for the falls - Mosi-oa-tunya ‘Smoke that Thunders’
There are few appropriate superlatives that have not already been applied to this magnificent natural wonder of the world; in many ways it defies description.
I am marvelled at this wonderful work of creation.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007


I don't know what to write about and that's why this blog has not been updated. It almost looks like i am out of ideas; every attempt to ponder upon a topic or to see through instances and happenings around me is stopped short by a block;. Almost like i can't think straight and no reserve to pull from.
I try to avoid writing wholly on my personal issues; but i guess i am gonna have to go in that direction. Blogging about personal stuff makes me feel like i am exposing myself to global scrutiny and criticism. Especially when there might be someone who will be able to decode exactly what you are talking abt even to the real characters involved.But really i think i should divulge some stuff.
I am experiencing a stablility issue or let me say my present wavery state (in my thinking) and somehow that might have reflected in my recent previous write-ups. I beleive that alot if not all challenges or issues that i experience stems from a spiritual hitch. Right now, i'm not getting spooky. I mean my relationship- with my creator - God almighty and not some diabolic stuff.
Right now, i feel like I am on earth and God is in Jupiter; i just can't connect. And this is translating into my conscious experience.
I feel some form of no essence to my actiivities. I just don't get it; I don't derive satisfaction from anything really almost like i live each day as it comes without expectation.
The funny thing is i know what i need to do to get back on track but somehow i am confused and don't trust my ability to do what i need to do to get thru this.
This is obviously not a starting point. It just may be.

Friday, January 26, 2007

"Work and Money"

"Work for the money, the love will come after". This is a statement in a book on career management. It is not a general fundamental truth, though it is extensively true. People often work, want to work, change jobs basically for the financial reward. A lot is written about this in the "unemployment and unskilled labour" post.
However, people take up jobs for several reasons depending on the pyramid/hierachy of needs (Abraham Maslow) - Physiological, Safety, Sense of belonging, esteem, Self actualization. The lowest of the need is physiological, that is the basic need of food, air,shelter and clothing. And the highest is Self actualization.Looking at it from this angle, one can say that human needs vary based on social status. Someone can take up a job in order to have a sense of purpose and a sense of integration (self actualization). One will think that the basic physiological needs would have been satisfied before one can desire self actualization (i mean, why would someone want to strive to be the best he can without 1st being able to satisfy his lowest needs?). Perhaps, that is possible if the burden of meeting the primary needs is not directly borne by that individual.
People can also take up jobs to have a sense of belonging, feel a sense of identity and boost their morale. More often than not, a person without a job can develop an esteem problem regardless of status.

One cannot ignore the fact that money can determine what job we choose or even override the intent to do a job we really desire. Earlier today, a friend shared his experience (career wise) with me. He wanted a core IT job, but he was offered something in IT but not his actual desire. Anyway, it was difficuilt for him to reject the job because the pay was higher than he expected to earn even with his desired job. So he took up the job with the hope of resigning after a few months. Guess what? His salary was doubled after about 4 months and it became even harder and almost impossible to leave the job. Months ran into years and he still could not resign. Fortunately though, after a few years he started to do the type of IT job he wanted. He is beginning to get fulfilled on his job and the financial reward is not bad either.

Does that mean it is possible for one to start out on the tangent and still be able to get back in line? Well yeah, i guess. But one fact still remains which is - basic needs have got to be satisfied before other abstract needs can be satisfied. However, if one can, it's better to start up with what you really want and continue in it even if the pay is meagre(which is temporal). It's a learning process.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Beauty is not in the eye of the beholder

Beauty is not in the eye of the beholder

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” – This means beauty is how you see it. That is, there are varying standards for beauty and what is acceptable to one person as being beautiful might be unacceptable to another. We’ve seen enough of that in the previous post.
Beauty being in the eye of the beholder is a matter of differences in taste. I will define it as an attempt to dismiss the disagreement in the differences in our tastes and preferences

On the other hand, looking at it critically, Is there really no standard for beauty and ugliness? Do we not want others to be agreeable of our judgment of beauty?
Each individual has got peculiar preferences and tastes but they are based upon one ideal and are only modifications of this. This means that there is a standard from which everyone generates their standards from.
The judgment for beauty is clearly an emotional issue and that is why the argument usually ends up with the maxim – “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”. If beauty is as subjective as we all perceive it to be, then the question is – Is there anything as beauty and if there is, what is beauty?
Can one call something beautiful, if he pleases merely himself alone?

Many things may have charm, attraction and agreeableness to a person, but should it be called beautiful if it pleases him alone? If it’s called beautiful, then one must expect the same satisfaction from others.

Friday, January 12, 2007

Is beauty skin deep?

I'm not too sure if this title is appropriate for this article. I think it's a bit of an over statement for the content but i just don't seem to want to bother my head for a more appropriate heading.

Some People say Beauty is inward, some others think it is outward and another think it is both outward and inward.
Whatever school of thought you belong to, beauty is what you say it is. But really, can beauty be only inward?
I saw a documentary titled "Is beauty skin deep?" and remember hearing something that sounds like this - "beauty is largely physical (outward) though a good personality can compliment the physical beauty. Beauty as our environment recognises it, is largely physical. An outwardly beautiful person will get more attention and have more opportunities than an otherwise looking person. In the Fashion and entertainment world (which are mega businesses), Nobody really cares if your character stinks so long as you have the look for the industry. Though an inwardly beautiful person may also be seen and appreciated, perhaps only when time is taken to know the personality behind the looks".
I think Everyone is beautiful in their own ways, though it might be concealed by 1 or 2 things. No one has it all together. We have more beauty than we can imagine; we only need to harness those qualities that make us stand out.

Have a great weekend.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Unemployment and unskilled labour.

Not that jobs are not available; based on my observations, unemployment persists for two reasons:
  • Shortage of skilled and experienced professionals
  • A large percentage of unskilled people in the labour force.
Are there really no jobs or no people to fill them? What do you think?
There are lot of job openings but no manpower to fill them.The unemployed man might be educated but is he specialised? There
is shortage of specialised manpower in the labour force. People move from one field of interest to the other every now and then majorly for increase in financial rewards and don't bother much about focusing on a particular field and sharpening their skills in that field.There are a lot of openings out there for experienced and specialised professionals; infact finding that kinda manpower is difficult.
I work in an HR firm and i've seen this trend. We have stacks and a huge online database of entry level and unprofessional resumes. Getting a trainee position has become really competitive because there are too many people out there who know bits and pieces of a lot (which eventually amounts to nothing) and nothing of anything.
Getting specialised and gaining experience might not have any immediate gratification but the reward is inevitable and long term. While a job hopper moves from one job to the other in varying fields (and loosing time) for monetary reward, the one who wants to get skilled focuses on his field of interest in an environment that allows for learning, development and adds relevent experiential value not particularly making financial reward a prime yardstick.
The opportunities for a skilled and experienced professional is limitless. He has a variety of offers to choose from because he is in high demand.
Bottomline is, if you want to leave the league of the unemployed and job seekers, get specialised. Focus on a field you are interested in and make yourself relevant in that field. Eventually, you will be the one declining mouth watery job offers for even much more mouth watery ones.


Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Loosing Gracefully

While growing up, we were taught a lot by our teachers, parents, friends and other family members but somehow, the art of loosing gracefully was left out. Maybe because our teachers also didn't know how to loose and let go gracefully.

I know being at the loosing end is painful and difficult especially in a society where somehow subconsciously we have imbibed the "do or die" attitude. (I am not calling this attitude bad).

We hold on to stuff that we should let go because of the fear of the unknown. we wonder how life will be without the baggage. We just find it almost impossible to make that choice of letting go.

There are at times when it's so crystal clear that your partner wants out and there's no reversing it; you and i know when it's really over but we just won’t let go.

The loss of a relationship can be incredibly hard - you can feel so much pain. There's not only the grief from losing someone important in your life, but the pain of seeing your hopes and dreams of a future life together disappear as well. Sometimes this is the hardest part - having to totally readjust your view of how you saw your life unfolding in the next 5 to 10 years. Suddenly, you can't see into the future and it's scary.

The fear of starting over, Difficulty in trusting again, one might even develop an identity crisis.
All these fears keep us from bowing out of a lost battle; we still want to hang in there and hope something can be done while enduring undignifying heart wrenching hurts and pains. This form of ‘needy and clingy’ attitude but sometimes, we just think it's a hopeless situation.

Sometimes letting go just happens after you've let yourself grieve and rage and whatever else you need to do. Other times, people have to deliberately and consciously focus on letting go. It is tempting to hold on, and scary to let go. Saying to yourself that you are letting go of your ex-partner can be helpful. Interrupting yourself when you get stuck thinking or talking about her/him and redirecting your focus onto something else is all part of letting go.

Filling your life with activities that you enjoy - creative, playful, sociable, soulful activities - are all ways to nurture yourself back to health.

One can loose with respect, dignity and self esteem intact- that is loosing gracefully. Accept it's over and it's not within your control and move on. Don't sit down there whining and being a pest. Move on!

Being able to loose gracefully touches all areas of existence; cus faceit, life is a battle and winning is not guaranteed all the time.

You don't have to be the one to have the last say in an argument, you don't always have to justify your actions. Learn to accept your faults and mistakes and look for ways to make up for them.

It's difficult to do; but we'll be stronger and better for it.


Monday, January 08, 2007

2007 - Watch out!

Hey Folks! Welcome to a great 2007.
I am extremely enthusiastic about this year, i just know that it's going to be like no other. I am happy that 2006 is over; it's a closed chapter. All the wrong choices and mistakes of 2006 are gone. I have a clean slate, I will set a good premise for the year and i'll build on it good choices and actions. I will not compromise on right standards.
I see my 2007 filled with surprises so long as i do my own part. I'm about to experience a year i've never experienced in my life on earth. This year is filled with goodies if you can harness it.
Congratulations! we made it.